….You can’t always get higher
Just because you aspire
You could expire even knowing.
Don’t push the hands
Just hang on to the band
You can dance while your knowledge is growing….
“Another Tricky Day”, by The Who.
(If you’re reading this before it’s finished, sorry! I’m paranoid about losing the entry)….
Hello everyone. If you’re wondering why it’s been so long since I’ve updated this; it’s because it’s taken this long for me to get over my anger at my last entry not saving. I had written this huuuuge entry about a birthday party I went to, and some other things, so I was really, really pissed when it didn’t save. Especially since this blog is supposed to be so good at auto-saving.
Anyway. We’ll begin where we left off, I suppose. The birthday party.
It was quite the party, I must say. I don’t remember much about Friday night, except all the drama with one of our friends…. I won’t name her here. Anyway. After that, it was pretty much the normal, run of the mill party. Because the entire weekend seemed to run together, I do not remember much about Friday specifically.
I got drunk, I do remember that. Seeing as I wanted to party in honor of Keith Moon for some odd reason. I remember; it’s because my ‘The Who’ obsession began after the anniversary of Moonie’s death, I wanted to pay tribute to him some way, and what better way to pay tribute than to get smashed and smoke cigarettes! lol
Anyway. We stayed over, naturally. It’s a rule with parties held at Jenny’s: If you drink, you’re staying overnight. I drank more on Saturday night, but since I wasn’t drinking with the intent to be wasted (aka, I took my time), the most I got was a good buzz.
Jenny had informed us that there was a kareoke contest at the bar.
So we went to the bar. I sang several songs before the contest started, as did Jenny and the rest of my friends. Then, the contest started. We were informed that, if we won, we’d be getting a $50 gift certificate to the bar, and we’d get entered in the finals, where we could win $1000 in cash.
I sang “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston, naturally. I’d sung it once before the contest started and gotten a huge response, so I figured I’d do it again for the contest. Besides one of my other friends, there really was no competition. Considering most of the other entries were half drunk, old people singing bad country songs….
I was still overwhelmed when I won…. The finals are on December 15th, and I hope to God I win that $1000. I really need the money. Hell. I’d be able to get my iPod, be able to pay off my college bill, and register for next semester, and I’d have it all paid for. Plus some extra to build my savings account up again…
I want to win so bad, yet I don’t want to build my hopes up too far. Just getting entered is an honor, even if I don’t win… still… I’m crossing my fingers. I feel bad for thinking this, but I really hope that most of the other finalists are horrible singers, so I’ll almost win by default. I have two rivals in the finals, though. Jenny is an amazing singer, and so is her sister Amanda. I’m really hoping it’s only a choice between us three.
Anyway. In a strange twist of the parties we normally have at Jenny’s, we decided to stay over Saturday night as well.
Sunday night… now that is probably the second drunkest I’ve ever been. We used my $50 gift certificate to eat brunch. We had a pizza. I had six shots of UV Blue with one bottle of Mountain Dew, and I bought two screwdrivers for one of my friends that was of age, and a shot of UV Blue. So I was feeling pretty good when we got back to Jenny’s.
Then, people decided we needed to have more flaming Dr. Peppers (which are, half a shot of bacardi 151, half root beer schnapps, with a spoonful of Everclear on top. You have half a glass of beer off to the side. You light the shot on fire, immediately drop it into the glass of beer, and chug the entire glass). I had probably 2 & 1/2 of those. We ran out of root beer schnapps… so later, I had a shot that was half bacardi 151, half Everclear.
Let’s just say that that is the last time Everclear passes my lips. It was the very first time I’ve ever gotten sick after drinking. It wasn’t until hours later though.
So, as you can see, I saw the weekend as a fitting tribute to Keith Moon… I got smashed twice, and won a kareoke contest.
That was the majority of what I was going to write last time.
The reason I write now, is that I’m entirely confused. About my guy situation. I have survived and gotten over one huge crush, and survived a relapse of another crush, and now there’s this guy. You might remember him.. He was the one I met on the internet, who I mistakenly thought lied to me over the phone.
I have complete confidence that he did not lie to me, and I’ll tell you why. I’ve gotten to know him better than I did then, and he is just not the sort of person who would do something cruel like lie to me over the phone.
You might think he’s just playing me now, but I can tell he’s not. Having lied myself (and learning from my man related mistakes), I know pretty damn well when someone else is trying to lie to me about these sorts of things. He’s just.. not. I’m pretty sure he’s been hurt in the past, so he’s not about to do it to someone else.
I’m just… nervous. Not because of anything he’s told me, or done (although I’ve only met him once)… It’s just that, I’ve been run over and stepped on so many times, I’m afraid to let him too close to me…
It’s kinda sad though, because nothing he’d said or done would suggest that he is that sort of person, at all… It’s almost as if I’ve been trained to expect those bad sorts of thing to happen to me.
I guess I’m just a bit apprehensive, is all.
Still…. I don’t want to make him pay for the misdeeds of others.
Like that travesty with Chad (I tried to be friends with him, which just made me discover how much more I hate him. If his stupid wife is still patrolling my blog, she is free to argue with me about this. Her husband is a disgusting excuse for a human being, and in my opinion, he is just wasting space on our overcrowded earth. Don’t even get me started on my opinion about her….).
Anyway. That’s pretty much what I wanted to write about….
Oh. I forgot. I signed up with a temp agency a while back, and things are looking good for them getting me a temporary spot at the Kraft factory, filling jello cups or something. Only thing is, I can’t wear jewelry of any kind, I can’t paint my nails, and I have to purchase steel toed boots. Full leather ones. They can’t have suede on them anywhere. I won’t mention that to the parents until I know for sure I have a spot (even if it is temporary)….
Okay. THAT’S all I wanted to say…. Until next entry, au revoir!