-from the song by A-ha
I fully realize just how long it’s been since I’ve bothered to write here. It’s ot that nothing has happened because believe me, shit happens. Mostly to me, so don’t worry.
Seriously, though. I seem to be going through a bit of a rough spot, and I’ll tell you why.
Several weeks ago, I worked a normal day at work. I was going to start a little plan to save me some money. Sometimes I stay after work to have a few drinks. I was planning to instate a week on, week off plan. As in, don’t stay after to drink at all one week, then the next week, I’d allow myself one day to stay after and drink.
Well, let’s just say that plan never got started. I had way too much to drink, so why I decided I could drive home was beyond me. I didn’t hit anything, didn’t do anything stupid (aside from getting behind the wheel in the first place), but I still got pulled over. I was twice the legal limit. The entire experience, what with getting handcuffed and having to spend an hour in the police station getting fingerprinted and explaining things, will not be repeated. I am responsible. I’ve never driven home like that before, it’s not like me.
At first I was really beating myself up over it, thinking that it was the end of my life, but pretty soon I realised that was a stupid way to look at it. Sure. The fine is going to suck. Not being able to drive anywhere until November (with the exception of work when I get a work permit) will suck. Sure, the court date on the 18th is going to suck.
But I learned a lesson. A very valuable lesson, and if it takes all of that for something to sink in, so be it. Nobody got hurt. I didn’t collide with anything.
This could have been much worse. Thankfully it wasn’t. I’d rather have fines to pay than the knowledge that somebody got injured because of a single lapse in my judgement.
This does not mean I will quit drinking at work. True, I’ve put it on hold for the time being, but this doesn’t mean I have to cut it out completely. I just can’t be stupid about it. Plus, I needed to cut down on it anyway. I don’t really see myself staying after much until I get my license back. Besides, pretty soon here, the seasonal restaurant I work at is going to open, and my days there start at 8am. So it’d probably be a good idea not to get hammered at night when I have to work bright and early the next morning.
I hope nobody thinks any less of me because of this. Everyone makes mistakes. Granted, not the same mistakes with the same severity, but nobody is perfect. I’ve learned from it, and for the most part I’ve moved on emotionally.
A week or so later, when I was emerging from the spell of beating myself up from that, something else happened. It hadn’t been ten days from the date of my lapse of judgement, so I could still drive. I got off work exceptionally early. It was pouring down rain, very hard. I was on my way home, when it got so bad I could barely see. I pulled into the second hand store to wait some of it out (and to browse around, so long as I was there). It let up a bit and I left.
But when I got closer to home, it got shitty again. It was raining so hard, my wipers were on full blast and I could still barely see. About a quarter of a mile from home, I notice a truck behind me is following me a little too closely for comfort. I remember thinking “You can tailgate me all you want, but I’m not speeding up. I can barely see.” And I was going at least 25mph, probably even a little under that. Visability was really horrible, I could barely see in front of the car at all. I was wishing my wipers had turbo mode.
I get to my driveway, which is on the right side. To avoid hitting the curb, I swing a little out towards the left while I turn (I have been doing this since I started driving in HS). The idiot who was tailgating me that whole time sped up to pass me, and drove towards the right side of the road. He claimed I swung waaay out and that he thought I was turning into the driveway across the street from ours. Long story short, he rammed the right side of my car towards the end. (The picture was taken a day or two later, hence it being sunny)
Luckily, he missed hitting my back door or the brake light.
Here’s another shot if you care to look:http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj281/OpenTheDoor_Blue/My%20photos/DSCF9522.jpg
I stopped the car right there, got out and screamed “What the FUCK were you thinking?”
He started screaming at me how I swung way out, he thought I was going to turn into the other driveway, I didn’t use my turn signal (which I always do; sometimes my blinker kicks itself off and has to be turned on several times per turn), yadda yadda yadda.
My dad came out and argued with the guy for a bit while my mom called a cop. At one point this idiot was wagging his finger right in my dad’s face. I was going inside so I didn’t catch what was being said, but the guy was babbling about his insurance, he wasn’t tailgating or speeding, he had a black box in his car that would show just how fast he was going…etc.
I gave the cop my story… Later, while dad was doing insurance stuff, I learned that we won. On the accident report the insurance guys gave, it was all the other guy’s fault, and he WAS tailgating, and going too fast for the conditions.
We have to get a repair quote for the insurance guys, but it’s not something that needs to be repaired per say. Not like if he’d busted up my tail light, then my car wouldn’t be able to be driven anywhere by anyone until we could get it repaired. Or the back door. We had a car with one smashed up back door you couldn’t open; that got very annoying on family car trips.
So yeah. That’s what’s been going on during my little hiatus from writing here.
Today, I took a walk to turn in some stuff at the library and I have a few pictures. Note that these weren’t necessarily taken with anything artistic in mind, I just wanted to show what I see on some of my walks.
I love this gigantic tree. I wish we had one like it closer to my house.
Do as I say not as I do, children. Standing in the middle of the street to take a picture should be frowned upon. 🙂
That is all she wrote for this entry. I won’t be doing much until the next one except working and contemplating things.