Day 190, in which the world is still a sauna.

Well, my world anyway. It was pants shittingly hot again today. Okay, well not pants shittingly, but it was DAMN CLOSE.

Even now, at 9pm, it’s still 89 degrees. says it feels like 107.

I can’t complain, but sometimes I still do.

HA! Couldn’t resist quoting Joe Walsh. Really, though. I may be mentioning how hot it is, but I would much rather have a heat index of 110 (which is what tomorrow’s is supposed to be) than temperatures of 30 below zero.

Speaking of the weather, my garden is full of weeds but everything seems to be doing rather well. Everything but the eggplant plants. They still haven’t really gotten much bigger. They just… exist. They’re surviving though.

Almost all of the tomato plants have little green tomatoes on them, the zucchini has several tiny zucchini growing on it, I saw a little cucumber on the cucumber plant. The potato plants are getting quite big. And the pumpkin plant really seems to be taking off. I didn’t see any pumpkins yet, but I didn’t look super hard.

That is pretty exciting. It’s the first garden that is completely mine to work on so I’m excited for it to do well.

I don’t know. Today was all right, but the heat just gets to you after a while.

I did go with mom to the library. We sat in there for over an hour. I think closer to 2. I checked out four movies and already watched two of them. My parents went to dinner and a movie, then to the PFLAG meeting so I had lots and lots of uninterrupted tv time. That almost never happens, as dad usually hogs the tv.

The movies I watched? First, Dan in Real Life, in which Steve Carell is unbearably adorable. I’d seen it before but not for years so I couldn’t remember what happened. It was just as good this time around. I made a revelation during that movie. The guy who I may have mentioned in this blog before? The one who gave me a bunch of shit excuses probably to avoid having to go on dates with me? I finally told him through text that it would be nice if he acted like he gave a shit about seeing me, and that I couldn’t wait around for him anymore.

It felt really good. I’m still a little apprehensive about it, but… it felt too one sided. Like I was always the one putting forth all the effort. Like it was always me that was trying so hard, and he just sat back and let me do it.

Well, fuck that. If his balls drop and he decides to talk to me about it, then fine, but he never does. He won’t reply to any text that has the least bit of negativity in it, and that’s something else I can’t handle.

We were never a couple by any means, but couples have discussions and even arguments.
It’s not all just “Oh sigh I miss you when can I see you again” cuddly crap. If he can’t put up with the difficult shit, he doesn’t deserve everything else.

Anyway. I watched that movie, then decided after getting all crabby about the guy situation, I decided to put in Howl’s Moving Castle, which I checked out from the library again.

I swear, I fall in love all over again any time I watch any Hayao Miyazaki movie. I know Howl’s Moving Castle was based on a book, but I still love that movie to bits. I won’t ever read the books, probably, because I don’t want the image of the movie ruined. It’s too perfect for me. I know the book was the original, but… I can’t help it. It would be like reading the original Little Mermaid where she turns into seafoam. Disappointing and rather soul crushing after you’ve grown up with the Disney version.

Classic literature is so damn depressing sometimes. Like the book Hunchback of Notre Dame.  It’s not tragic, it doesn’t make the story more poignant, it just crushes my soul. Which is why Edgar Allan Poe is one of the few classic authors I can get into at all.

But I didn’t come here to go on about authors. Mom and I are going to visit grandma tomorrow so I don’t want to be online for ages. I still have to get up at 5 for the paper, then depending on what time mom wants to leave, I’ll probably have to take a bath right when I get home and I just want to make sure I get decent sleep.


+Some thin sliced ham, at 5am.

+An ear of corn, and some pasta with basil pesto.

+A salad with thin sliced beef, a sprinkle of cheese, and slivered almonds.

Then…. I didn’t have a super great day in terms of snacking. I had a bowl of watermelon, a few gummy worms, a bowl of corn pops, a handful of chips, a skinny cow brand candy bar thing,  and a tiny freezer pop.

I felt kind of bad so I while watching a movie I did some ab workouts, lifted the small hand weights, and did a tiny bit of walking workout.


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