My Howard Jones concert experience, part 1 {my texts and notes}

On June 26th, 2012, I got to see Howard Jones in concert. This is the first of 2 entries. This is a list of texts I sent, and notes I saved on my phone, written throughout the day. The next entry will be some pictures from the trip, as well as some more maybe… in depth descriptions of stuff. And my current musing on the subject, all that jazz.

The bits with the asterisks are text messages I sent people. The other stuff is from the notes on my phone.

*7:14am- Wow, some guy waiting to get on the bus is a cranky mofo.

7:36am- First fiasco of the day. Dude almost grabbed the little folder with my concert ticket inside. He then grumped about it. Still awaiting bus arrival. Hope fellow passengers are more sufficiently caffeinated than that grumpy old man. CBS morning show is on tv in bus station. Nothing exciting from what I can see. Sound is drowned out by vending machine hums and two large video game thingers. Although the menards jingle was in fact loud enough to hear. Stupid ads anyway. Butt is sufficiently vacuumed into seat in bus station. The seats are either perfectly shaped or my butt is large. A bit of both, probably.

*7:56am- Everyone on this bus is like, asleep.

8:00am-Bus is eerily quiet. Kind of full. Seated next to stranger. Oh well. Everyone is like sleeping. Bus driver is a sassy black man. Hopefully after layover I can manage two seats to myself. Probably not, but oh well. View is really nice, not taking pictures because I don’t want the mennonite lady to think I’m taking a picture of her. Different lady was woken suddenly, the look on her face was priceless. Omg. Thankfully I didn’t laugh but it was hard.

*8:22am- Pictures of food on billboards is an evil, evil thing.

8:40-layover almost done. Ate part of a sandwich. And some string cheese. Baby on board will not stop crying. White out mountain dew is delicious. Is it kosher to eat chipotle chicken wraps at 8:45 in the morning?

*9:30am- We just passed that adult bookstore in Owatonna lmao.

9:55- Bored. It’s overcast which is a bit crap bc the forecasts said sunny and shit. Didn’t bring an umbrella. If it comes to that I suppose I can buy a cheap one.

*9:59am- I saw a Japanese restaurant called “Hana”. I thought it said “Haha” and I was like, lol, that’s a funny name for a restaurant.

*10:26am-Why do they call it HOM furniture? God damn that annoys me. It’s spelled HOME, idiots.

10:35-Just leaving Burnsville. Not too much longer now. People are talking more now, thank god. It was like a funeral in here earlier. I wonder where other people are going. Lady next to me is headed for Detroit, won’t get there until tomorrow morning. There is another baby crying. Watch the first one start back up
10:40am- There is a cute little blonde boy that keeps looking around, standing up in his seat and whatnot. It’s the cutest thing ever.

*10:43am- There are Jimmy Johns restaurants everywhere. Jesus.
*10:45am- An airplane just flew like right over the bus.

*11:22am- Two men drinking out of a flask of vodka in bright daylight. Oookay then.

*11:27am- Already passed a gay bar.

*12:17pm- Gave up trying to find my way on foot. I will just call a cab when I’m ready, goddamn.

*12:23pm- Going to a giant Barnes & Noble store.

*12:29pm- Doctor Who dvds. I will be leaving here without them, sadly.

*12:35pm- Oh shit, I found the Alton Brown cookbooks.

*12:49pm- Passion iced tea and a shortbread cookie shaped like a strawberry-omg.

[Between me eating that cookie and the next text, I stumbled upon a cute little candy store, and even though I was getting irritated and impatient because I didn’t know where I was, I just had to go inside]

*12:57- I just bought a half pound of candy fruit slices, JFC that candy store had everything.
*1:02: I walked in and actually said “Holy shit” under my breath. Small place but candy as far as the eye could see.

*1:27- Pigeons are bigger up close than I imagined.

1:29pm- I am now aimlessly wandering around Minneapolis. I will call a cab when I’m ready, which I am super nervous about because I hate calling people and I’ve never called a cab before. I’m sure that will be fine. I need to find something to do to kill time, my feet and back are killing me. Seen lots of interesting people. I think I’m going to get up and walk around some more.

*2:29- I think my face is sunburnt already.
*2:31- A dude with like 2 foot long dreadlocks just rode past on a bicycle.
*2:34- Just passed a frat house with a la-z-boy on the front porch.

2:36pm- In a cab. Sherlock has ruined cabs for me. Driver is an old old man wearing a cap.

*2:41- Holy shit I found a store full of bongs.

*2:58-Just spotted a passing long haired, bearded man with a guitar on his back. I love this town.
*2:59- (I was sitting in a diner) The music in here reminds me of a spongebob quote: “First you must acquire a taste for freeform jazz”.

3:18- Killing time in diner. After I finish my soda I’m going on a quest to find a bathroom. I may explore some more since doors don’t open until 7.

*3:21-Hot long haired man spotted going past outside. I actually said ‘holy shit’ out loud.

*3:28-What kind of shitty CVS pharmacy doesn’t have a bathroom?
*3:33- Frozen yogurt place, hell fucking yeah.

3:51- Just bought frozen yogurt from a cute little place just so I could use their customer only bathroom. Not that I didn’t want frozen yogurt. I had peanut butter and chocolate flavors, and they were so damn good. I’m now sitting on a bench next door to the Varsity theatre. 3 hours left to wait. If my patience holds out, I’m planning on sitting here until like, 5 something. May explore a tiny bit more before then. Dunno. Passed a bar called “Library”. Oh, what won’t college kids do?
Potheard just bought a new bong at the shop across the street. Found that a little amusing. I have come to the conclusion that Jimmy Johns restaurants are everywhere. Thought about going there and then I was like, fuck that, I didn’t come all the way to Minneapolis to eat at a chain restaurant that’s got a location across the street from where I work.

*4:09- Hippie man with three swimsuit clad little girls sitting on bench next to me. It’s really amusing. He’s nice.
*4:13-They’re all talking about skateboards.
*4:39-Do you ever wonder if people that are allergic to bees can eat honey?

4:42- I think they’re doing soundchecks in the theatre now. That’s a bit exciting. I’m bored out of my mind. I mean I’m excited but holy damn, I am not a patient woman, so things like this are trying

5:02-Pretty sure I’ve either spotted a worker or the first other concert goer. He keeps taking pictures of the theatre sign. Hopefully he crops me out in case I’m making a derpy face.

5:48- They’re doing sound checks and from what I hear his voice still sounds great, still hitting high notes and whatnot. There is one couple here (waiting outside with me).

*5:10- Holy shitttt I see him (Howard Jones, caught a glimpse of him quick as he was going in the theatre for soundchecks and such. These two or three men were like getting him to autograph shit which I found a little… eh, idk, too forward. It’s like, don’t come to enjoy the music or anything, but shove all your merch in front of him to sign like he’s a fucking autograph printing press).
*5:13-man in a kilt. Day made.

*5:52- They’re sound checking “What is Love” right now.

*7:09- They have a keytar. I want a keytar.

7:12pm- Standing at front of the stage, waiting for shit to go down. This is a really nice place, I’d come here again.

*9:25- half time. During one of the songs for several lines of it he stood straight in front of me and sang right to me. I was like, ‘Oh fuck thank god I knew the words to that part’.
*11:09- Bought an autographed dvd.

*11:20- forgot to mention, also shook his hand when he was on stage.
*11:26- Turns out people really do yell “TAXI!” at incoming taxis like in the movies.

*11:37- I just gave Howard Jones one of my drawings which he described as beautiful. Holy fucking shitballs.
*11:40- He also signed another of my drawings. I can die happy now.
*11:43- This is going to sound weird but he smelled really good (I’m not kidding, he smelled like rose water or something).

*11:58pm- The irony of a “Bike, walk, move” ad on the side of a bus… lol.
12:18am- Waiting at the bus station. The concert was orgasmic. During one of the songs, for a few longs, he sang right to me (Thankfully I knew the words, lol). I also shook his hand (while he was on stage). Then afterwards, I met him. He called my artwork beautiful, and I gave him one of my drawings. He signed another that I kept. I am still freaking out. I may try to catch the return bus at 5am. If not it’s going to be a long 12 hours. I should remember to say, my cab driver here was a chatty Indian man, stark contrast to my first cab driver, an old white man who didn’t say a single word. 12:35am- an egg muffin sandwich from a vending machine is fucking delicious. Jamie Oliver and Alton Brown would cry if they knew. I’ll make a recipe from one of their cookbooks to make up for it.
*12:39am (I was waiting in the bus station) Nancy Grace is on tv bitching. Shut the fuck up, woman. Nobody gives a shit. 12:55am- Fried. I’ve been awake for 20 hours straight and most of it on my feet. Fun but holy shit am I tired. Thinking of putting myself in a corner and trying to sleep but that probably won’t happen. In that case, Mountain Dew to the rescue.
1:24am- Station is closed, myself and like 7 other people have to wait outside. There goes the sleep idea. What the hell, it’s part of the adventure.
3:54- Abandoned sleep attempt. This is making me want to hand out pillows and blankets to all the homeless people. I must have gotten a tiny bit of sleep because I feel better but thank god I bought that mountain dew before the station closed. 4:04- shouldn’t have looked at the nutrition facts for that bag of potato skins I just ate. As you can tell, I’ve got stellar eating habits. Mountain dew, potato skins, candy fruit slices, and I actually have a somewhat crushed bag of doritos I haven’t opened. Thank fuck I did all that walking around/dancing. It might just even out. Phone flashed low battery warning so I’m going to wrap this up. Jesus I’m long winded. Good thing I’m fat for insulation, it’s like nice out but far too cold for my taste. Holy watermelon candy fruit slice batman. Oh yeah. I was wrapping this up. Shit
4:26am- Hit critical mass of tired, currently grooving to Honky Cat by Elton John. Ps: thank fuck for mountain dew. And mp3 players. Look up who invented mp3 shit. Could be interesting. In half an hour I’ll have been awake for 24 hours.

{And that’s where the notes stopped because my phone died}


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