And any time you feel the pain, hey jude, refrain…

…Don’t carry the world upon your shoulders.
For well you know that it’s a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder…
-“Hey Jude” by the Beatles.

Well bonjour blog goers. Today’s entry will begin with a bit of a game of ‘good news bad news’. Or ‘good news, less good but not actually that bad news’.

The apartment I spoke of in my previous entry will have to wait. I called the guy to tell him I had the first months’ rent, and the deposit, and I left him a message on his phone. He called me back later that day to say that a good friend of his is going through a divorce and had nowhere else to go, so he’s temporarily staying in “my” apartment. The landlord told me he would call me when it was all settled and everything so I could move in.

So basically I’m still going to get it, I’ll just get it later than I expected. He doesn’t know how long it’ll be. Could be a couple weeks, could be a few months. Nobody knows.

This is technically a good thing. For one, I’ll have more time to save up money. And, since my parents have told me they’ll only let me take this computer with me when I have another job, it will give me more time to procure another job before I move out. So, while I was really disappointed initially, I realized it wasn’t worth the huge end of the world breakdown that I almost had over it. Speaking of those, I’ve had more of those lately than I care to remember. My hormones are just now getting back on track from the lovely week Mother Nature provided me with last week.

Now that that’s out of the way, I want to take this opportunity to bitch about Friday and Saturday nights at work. They sucked.

Friday night was super ultra busy. I was in a greeaaat mood, let me tell ya.
At one point there three people including me doing dishes. That could have been Saturday night but I’m pretty sure it was Friday night. Ugh. Despite the super busyness, I didn’t get off all that late.

Saturday night was a killer. They were having some beer fest event thing going on, and from almost the second I walked back to the kitchen, I was completely swamped. Adam worked and he’s very amusing, so that helped my mood a little, but not much. It was just ungodly busy. The kitchen closes at ten on Friday and Saturdays, and I didn’t get out of there until around 11:45 or so. I felt really lame being the only person left in the kitchen while one of my co workers who hadn’t worked that night was dancing (he only does this when exceptionally drunk), another was fairly drunk, but… my music was better than theirs. While their dj was forced to play bad country music I listened to Paul McCartney, and when the dj came back to the kitchen to use the back door so he could have a smoke break, I purposely put on Pat Benetar to sing to so he would hear me when he came back through the kitchen.

It worked. He told me I had a great voice and I should be in kareoke. I was even too flattered to bitch about how he pronounced it “kuh-roh-kee” instead of the CORRECT “Kah-ree-oh-kee”. I don’t know if that’s a pronunciation trend just in Iowa or elsewhere, but it torks me off.

Despite that, I was in a shitty mood when I got off work.

Anyway. I got off work, and had my free after work drink. I was stupid and called my ride before I thought to ask this bartending friend of mine if he’d give me a ride home. Of course he said yes.  While calling my ride he said he’d wait half an hour/forty five minutes to come so I’d have a little bit of time to chill out.

During this time, some creepy tubby guy told me his friend was looking for a girlfriend and asked if I’d be interested. I was going to ask if his friend were blind, ugly,  and or mentally retarded b/c that’s the only time people hit on me but I don’t think he understood because he said “Well he’s sitting behind you blah blah you can look for yourself” and I just ignored them. If he wants to  hit on me, tell him to hit on me himself, not have his friend come up and ask me for him.

This is not junior high, people. I’m turning 23 in four days, for crying out loud.

I felt bad when they walked away going “oh, she hates us let’s go blah blah” whatever else they said, but I was just not in the mood. I kind of slapped myself over it later because.. what if the guy was cute and/or I got along with him? Anyway. I had like three drinks in like ten minutes. Another wine cooler (not my free after work drink), a fuzzy navel, and a shot of peppermint schnapps. Which, with as low as my tolerance is now that I don’t hang out at the bar regularly, that was enough to get me druuunk.

So, after I asked the friend of mine for a ride and he said yes, I called home, thinking my dad would be in his chair waiting to come get me. No. I wake my mom up, I told her to tell dad not to come get me, but he’d already left.

So this older dude I haven’t seen at the bar forever was in there and was talking to me. And seemed to sense I was dwelling on something or someone and told me shit like there are better people out there, I looked way better than I did a year ago, if it were him he’d blah blah” and some other shit I don’t remember, but I was in a bad mood anyway, right before I went outside to wait for my ride I was like “Why is it only creepy old men that find me attractive?!” because with the exception of high and or drunk guys, only old creepy guys find me attractive…

So I was in a great depressed/grumpy mood already. Then when my dad finally got there, the entire ride home we argued about how it was such a bad idea for me to call home, I only ever thought of myself, I should have given up after I called him the first time, blahhh. And the water works were on. The faucet handle was busted. I was blubbering like.. well like something that blubbers a lot. I don’t know. I reminded myself why nobody liked drunk crying depressed me at those parties I used to go to. I felt like crap.

Anyway… The next day was better. Yesterday, my mom and brother were planning to go to Medford Mall to do some shopping. I initially said I just wouldn’t go, but after last night I decided I needed a good pick me up, and a day away from home, so I decided to go with them.

It was rainy, but not as rainy as it was last time we went. I didn’t end up spending much money either. I chronicled the day taking pictures with my cell phone.  I’m probably going to write a facebook blog about it with the pictures and the songs we heard while on the way/while there… but until then, I got a burgandy zip up hoodie from Old Navy.. It has a white silhouette of a bird with a heart on it, and says “hope” in capital letters on the left sleeve… and it was only 13 bucks. For a hoodie. And I’d been looking for another zip up hoodie since my brown heart/wings one is getting on in years (lol). I have this purple nice-ish blouse thing that I got from Lane Bryant last time we were at Medford (in June, I believe it was), and they had the blue version on the sale rack, so I got it. I also got these cheap books at the bookstore. One’s about unlocking your bipolar muse, and I thought it looked super interesting, plus it was only three dollars, so I figured what the hell. I also saw this book about psychedelics that looked interesting… I was ready to pay the 14 bucks it said on the back, but then I saw the 5 dollar sale tag on the front… so I got that too. I don’t feel bad since it was like 8 bucks for both of them.  I also got a slouchy crocheted hat  for seven bucks and a super on sale bracelet at Rue 21. I wasn’t going to buy the bracelet. Then I saw the 50 percent off sign which made it  cost a grand total of 1.25.  Other than a cheap little bag of mixed nuts at Harry & David that was all I bought. I still have to pay mom back for dinner though (we got fast food drive thru so we wouldn’t have to stop on the way back).

But I needed that. My feet were totally killing me after that but it was fun.

Today hasn’t been real eventful unless you count expanding my Paul McCartney picture collection by about 130 pictures “eventful”. And I’m still only on number 578 of 4000 some pictures of him on photobucket. There are a bunch of repeats, but still. That’s a hell of a lot of pictures.

I have to work tonight, and I’m a bit apprehensive about that after the weekend I had, but Mondays are not busy at all. I am a bit worried about these pans though. I stuck them underneath the sink on this like big stand thingy to get them out of the way till I had time to work on them, and I think I forgot them there. And I didn’t put away all the clean dishes I had at the end of the night, but.. they’re not open on Sunday, and I work today. I figure, I’ll have to do them today anyway. And I didn’t take out my garbage, but it was only like half full. I’ll live though, those are only little pieces of yarn in my craft case of unnecessary anxiety.

Anyway, that’s all I really have to talk about at the moment, so it is here I leave you.