-“Blue Sky”, by A-Ha.
*This is a long goddam entry, just to warn you*
Not only was today the worst day of my working life, it was the worst singular day of my entire life, from the time I was first conscious to right now.
First off, I was in bed until 7:30 and I had to be at work at 8. I had time to eat breakfast and get dressed, then I had to be out the door.
Once again, the register where everybody clocks in was giving me a hard time, so I just went “Fuck it”… We can write down the times we work and the boss lady will put them into the payroll… Besides, I could see that there was already a pile of dishes waiting for me, and I didn’t want to let them sit there.
So, I hadn’t been at work that long (your sense of time disappears when there is no clock to look at) when the boss lady was all “You’d better get on these, soon you’ll be getting bus tubs..” and said a little more but I really can’t remember what else. It was so hard for me to not blurt out “Well I can only do things so fucking fast, okay?”…
Also, not too far into the day, the boss lady was helping work the stove, and she motioned me over. Before I tell this bit, I should say that underneath one of the little oven things is the place where we store the rectangular pans of various sizes that they cook stuff in… So the boss lady motions me over and says something about, the pans need to be stacked right, or else they slide off and fall on our feet, and that really hurts. My very first, split second thought was, ‘Maybe you should wear proper shoes to work instead of sandals’, but it wasn’t a second before I said “Well I’m sorry they were put there that way, but I wasn’t the only one putting them away [yesterday]” and I broke down into tears. If it’s one thing I loathe about myself it’s how easily I cry. I fucking hate it. But I couldn’t help it.
On and off over the whole rest of the day, I was bursting into tears, because I wasn’t sure how in the fucking world I was going to ever finish without someone there helping me. Anyway. On with the day.
Pretty soon, the incessant monotony that made today my worst day ever began. Dishes just kept coming and coming, and I fell behind. I had time to get TWO glasses of water all day. I brought a bag of cough drops (because my throat’s being fucking stupid), and I barely even had time to unwrap those… And I was still behind. I had to be constantly either washing or putting away..
And more dishes kept coming. PM Park usually is open until 3pm, then they close for an hour to prepare for the evening. But while at work yesterday, my brother and I heard that they were no longer closing.
It was true. I was so behind, and yet people kept coming in, and I would barely get the dishes out of ONE bus tub before a FULL one was put right back in its place.
I called home, I can’t remember when. It almost felt like halfway through the day, but it was probably only a couple hours before I got home.. But I was damn near hysterical. I went ‘Is my brother home yet? I’ve fallen very behind at work, I can’t do it by myself’.. My dad actually had to ask me to repeat myself about four times, I was apparently crying that hard.
I know. It’s not a good idea to cry at work, but I had held it off as long as I humanly could, I really had no control over it at that point… I did regain control, but.. it was that bad.
I never did learn if my brother was home but dad said he’d talk to mom and see what he could do.
Which was nothing. It wasn’t his fault, and this isn’t against him, but I was really, really disappointed when nobody showed up. I mean, the boss lady could have called someone else and ask if they could help out for a couple hours…
Once again, only ONE of the servers helped me out. There was a point during the day in which I was totally swamped, and the server girls are sitting out front.. And one of them that’s a nursing student was telling a birthing story. A fucking birthing story. Did it ever occur to them that if they have a few free minutes, they could at least put away some clean plates? Fuck’s sake. I mean really.
And my server problem is not just mine… One of the three nice servers that works there was talking about how the other waitresses (I call them servers.. they’re the same thing, really) never finished up their jobs before leaving work. So it’s not just me who thinks some people aren’t pulling their weight.
When I finally did leave, there was one tray full of clean dishes to be put away (there were no others left), but I had to get out of there before more dishes came in. The boss didn’t care, but she did seem slightly torked that I hadn’t clocked in.
Once again, I was in such a hurry to leave that I didn’t ask her what hours I’d be working this week (fuck’s sake, it was 5pm when I got home), but when I call her tomorrow, I am telling her I cannot work until Saturday. She needs someone before then, tough. She will have to pull somebody out of thin air, then.
It is my punishment for not scheduling another dishwasher on fucking MEMORIAL DAY.
MEMORIAL DAY, WHEN EVERY OLD FART, HIS WIFE, AND THEIR GODDAM DOG GO OUT TO EAT
It’s a fucking holiday, and you schedule just ONE dishwasher?
Yesterday was bad enough, and it was not only NOT a holiday, I had my brother helping me out. My brother even told me on the way home that I’d have been screwed if he hadn’t been there to help out.
Well, today was at the very least as bad, if not worse. I’m fairly certain it was worse.
I don’t give two shits if I have to take a couple days’ lost pay. I wouldn’t even be scheduled all the days of the week, so I’m not sure I’m taking that much of a cut. Besides, she did tell me she likes people to have a few days in a row off.
Besides, to be able to even DO my job this weekend, I will need a few days off.
It’s like hell week.. You know, in stage shows and for concerts.. Hell week! The week before the big performance. That’s what working at PM Park is like, I swear… Except, there is no performance or ending of the Hell until the summer is over.
Summer used to be my favorite season, but it will cease to be the longer it goes on. I used to look so forward to summer.
No longer. Not if working at shitty restaurants like PM Park is my fate.
Which is why.. I might put moving out on hold to go back to school… So I won’t have to wash dishes the rest of my life.
But.. I don’t know. It all depends on how much money I’ve made by the time PM Park closes in September-October.
Anyway, that’s really all I have to say today.
You know, it’s funny. When I read this entry back to myself months from now, I’ll probably think I was overreacting or being melodramatic or something, I don’t know. Maybe I’m just not able to deal with as much as I should, I don’t know.
Okay. I’m seriously ending the entry now. I need to eat dinner. I haven’t had anything since 7:30am except ice water and cough drops.